The Pursuit of Happiness

Posted: January 15, 2014 in Music, Personal
Tags: , , , ,

Let me stop you right there, right now and tell you where you fucked up. You did not define what happiness, what success was for you and thus, set yourself up to never be happy. Those two sentences are not for you, my dear reader, but for me. Everytime I come back to this, I want to remind myself not only why it took so long for me to be happy, but why I lose my happiness.

If you stop and think about what is truly important to you, as an individual, based on your life and circumstances, it would be very easy to determine what could make you happy. The rub here, as in love and relationships, is that people forget this moment of enlightenment as soon as they see someone else happy doing something else. If you want to be a writer and you know it would make you happy, do that. If your friend is having the time of their lives as an accountant, don’t throw your dreams away to chase something meaningless to you. You will NEVER be happy that way. You have to learn to enjoy the very pursuit of happiness or you will, without a doubt, want to kill yourself before you ever achieve your goal.

Personally, I know what I want to do. I want to talk and be paid for it. Whether I’m writing game reviews, doing radio shows, or recording songs, I know I have shit to say, I know it’s good shit and I feel that I should be able to live off that. The path to making that a reality is arduous (which I spelled right the first time with no spell check LMAO!!) at best so I have to keep my eyes and ears open and really take in the journey to success. I will get there. It may sound cocky, but I am too talented not to. I, like you, just need to focus. I can’t throw my dreams away every time I have a setback or a bad day. I can’t stop moving forward for a second because the road behind me no longer exists. There is no childhood home to return to, there are fewer and fewer childhood friends to reminisce with and there is no father to run to when I’m in trouble. I must make it on my own two feet or die trying…literally.

As morbid as that may seem, the other side of the coin calls for me to enjoy life. Enjoy the lulls in activity, enjoy the waiting for responses, enjoy the time when no one is listening, because once they start listening, things will never be silent again. I have to enjoy everyday that I write a rhyme that no one will hear to a beat that no one will like about a story that no one cares about simply because they mean something to me. It won’t always be like this and it can change in an instant. One phone call, one email, one text and the roller coaster ride starts with no countdown and I’ll miss these days where I’m readily available for my friends to hit me up anytime…so will they.

Long story short, if you know what you want, start walking that path. Your path may be longer or shorter than someone else’s, but it’s your path and you can’t be happy walking someone else’s. Enjoy the journey friends.


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